Have you ever had feelings for someone and wondered if there was a way to get them to love you back? While true love has to happen naturally over time, psychologist Bobbi Wegner says when attraction, lust and attachment are present people are more likely to fall in love. “Attraction is what it sounds like: a curiosity, interest, or a liking for someone,” she explains. “Lust is a strong sexual desire for someone, and attachment is an emotional bond between two people.”
Therapist Ken Page explains that what makes people fall in love is “a mixture of true vulnerability, desire, sexuality, and romance that creates a blend - kind of like the Holy Grail - of safety, excitement, availability and shared love. That’s really what we’re looking for.” Knowing all that, if you’re genuinely interested in someone and want to encourage feelings of intimacy and closeness with them, this is how the experts say to do it:
- Gradually deepen intimacy - Shared vulnerability and time shared together can deepen intimacy. Page says, “Interactions that involve a gradual deepening of vulnerability in sharing, combined with letting the person know you like them” can help to create a loving relationship.
- Use body language - Things like eye contact and sensitive touch can encourage attraction, closeness and desire.
- Get out of your comfort zones together - Experiencing adventure together is a great way to deepen your connection together, according to Page. Doing exciting things together can help you bond, plus Wegner says it also shows the person you’re interesting and alluring.
- Remain your own person - Staying true to yourself is important for long-term love, not just for your individual growth, but to help maintain a sense of curiosity with your partner.
- Understand their needs - We all want to feel seen and understood by our significant other, so doing that is a big way to encourage someone to fall for you.
- Small acts of kindness - Doing little things that show them you love and care for them go a long way to remind them why they choose to be with you.
- Be patient - Real love takes time, so take things slowly and try to let things unfold naturally. Page explains that giving things time to move from a simmer to a boil is powerful for motivating long-term commitment.
Source: Mind Body Green