Everyone has their own idea of what they’re looking for in “the one,” but scientists have some suggestions. Scientists have spent decades trying to determine why we fall in love and their research has identified certain qualities that indicate you’ve found a keeper. These are the things that you want in a partner, according to science.
- Being smart - A new study from Finland finds that the smarter the man, the less likely he is to be unfaithful. Their research suggests more intelligent men are more likely to get married and stay married.
- Makes you laugh - Being able to laugh with someone is crucial, so if you laugh at his “dad jokes” while the rest of the world rolls their eyes, that’s all that matters. And one study has shown that men are more likely to have “mating success” if they have a good sense of humor.
- Actively supports your career - Husbands were a deciding factor in two-thirds of women in another study deciding to quit their jobs, often because their husbands wouldn’t change their work schedules or help more with watching the kids. So if you find a guy who considers your career just as important as theirs, consider it a green flag.
- Respects your opinions - No one wants to be with someone who doesn’t listen to what they have to say and according to relationship researcher Dr. John Gottman, if a man rejects his female partner’s influence, it could be a sign that he has power issues.
- Willing to put the work in - Relationships aren’t always easy, but they’re definitely harder if no one’s putting any effort into it. A study from the University of Texas finds that it’s not compatibility, but partners trying to make it work that makes for the most successful relationships.
- Celebrates your successes - Whether you’re trying to learn enough German to get by on a trip to Oktoberfest or trying to deadlift your bodyweight, having a partner who cheers your achievements is key. And science backs it up. Couples who celebrate each other’s successes are more satisfied with their relationships than those who don’t, according to another study.
- Sharing your values - Having a similar outlook in life could be key to relationship success, another study shows. That doesn’t mean you have to agree on everything, but if your priorities are the same, you’re likely to have more respect for each other and that’s good for the relationship.