- You can’t communicate without starting a fight
Relationship fights shouldn’t be more common than having regular conversations with one another. Communication is a key factor in a healthy relationship and if you can’t talk about things, even fun things, without it sparking a row, you’ve got problems.
- You bring up details of the last fight into the next one
Not sorting out the details of the last argument means that you’re probably going to take them into the next one, and the next one is going to come pretty quick on its heels too. Relationship fights need to be resolved otherwise they’re not a healthy tool for sorting out problems.
- You’re arguing every day
If you’re arguing every single day, that’s far too much. I know I said there’s no right or wrong amount, but every single day is too far. When do you get the chance to have fun together? Never, if you’re arguing constantly.
- You feel like you can’t express your feelings
You’re having too many relationship fights if you feel like you can’t talk about your feelings without knowing that it’s going to spark another argument. Again, communication is so vital, and if you can’t talk about things which are hurting you out of fear of a fight, that’s a huge red flag.
- You focus on the things that annoy you, rather than the things you like
When you’re in a fighting mindset, you become very negative. You start to focus on the things about your partner which annoy you. Instead, turn your attention to the things you like. We all have negative traits, but that doesn’t mean we should focus on them.
- Criticism has become a regular occurrence
A relationship that focuses upon criticizing each other is downright unhealthy. That is a sign of far too many relationship fights because the air around the two of you has become toxic. It’s time to sit down and get to the bottom of what is causing all of these arguments.
- Tough conversations are too difficult, so you avoid them
In every single relationship, there needs to be times when you sit down and have conversations that are a little difficult or deep. Healthy couples can do so without fearing it turning into a screaming match. It comes down to effective communication and being able to speak and listen in turn. Avoiding tough conversations is a damage limitation measure and not a long-term solution.
- You would rather spend time alone than with your partner
If you know that you’re just going to end up having another fight, you’ll probably prefer to spend time alone, in solitude and quiet. You might even prefer to spend time around your friends instead. If you’d rather be away from your partner because you’re sick of the relationship fights, that’s a sign you’re having far too many.
- Apologies are never given
The best way to end an argument is to accept blame if you’re the one who needs to do so. If there is never a ‘sorry’ uttered, and by that I mean a heartfelt ‘sorry’, then you’ve got into the habit of arguing for the sake of it.
- You regularly go to bed angry
Allowing issues to fester is just going to lead to another argument the next day. My grandma always told me that you should never go to bed on an argument and it’s a piece of advice I live by today. Going to bed angry just means you’re going to wake up angry too. Talk about it before you sleep and fix things as best you can.
- Honesty is lacking in your relationship
Not feeling like you can be open and honest with your partner, or feeling like they’re not doing the same with you, can lead towards bickering and relationship fights. You’re fighting too much if you no longer feel you can be open with your partner or honest about things going in your relationship and life.
- You feel like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster
A key sign of too many relationship fights is that you feel like you’re stuck on a never-ending emotional rollercoaster. Whilst some fighting is normal, feeling like you’re always on edge and always upset is not normal and should never become commonplace.
- You don’t care as much as you did, you simply argue for the sake of it
When you feel like arguing has become routine, you start to care less. That’s one of the major signs that you’re having too many relationship fights. Issues have become insurmountable and instead, you fight about everything else around that subject. You can’t see a way out of it, so you simply arguing for the sake of it instead.
- You find yourself bickering about stupid things
It’s normal to fight about random things occasionally *laundry detergent, remember?* but if it’s a regular event, you need to question why. This could be a sign of unresolved issues that are simply making the relationship feel toxic.
- Your friends tell you they’re concerned
If your friends tell you that they think you’re fighting too much with your partner, you should sit up and take notice. Often, someone on the outside looking in can see more clearly than someone who is in the thick of it.
Link: Love Panky